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Limericks Poems

Sunday Limericks

Kneeling Nun
Martin van Meytens – Kneeling Nun, c. 1731.

Fred the Sailor
There once was a sailor named Fred
Who convinced a young nun to wed
She said all this kissin
Was what I was missin
Now I have found Heaven in bed!

The Nun and the Priest
When the sun once rose in the east
It shone over a nun and a priest
They had spent the whole night
In ecstasies of delight
Now he’s defrocked, and he cares not the least.

The Young Man with the Lisp
A young man once developed a lisp
That made his speech a bit less than crisp
Still, when he asked for some wrenches
And they brought him some wenches,
He thought, Now I could get accustomed to this!

The Contagious Stutter
A man had a contagious stutter
Which spread with each word that he’d utter
And when he kissed a girl
It’d make her head whirl
And he’d smile when she’d ask for an-an-another.